When I first saw and heard about it on the news, I was heartbroken. To actually hear about stories of people drowning and dying in the flood, or getting lost; families couldn't get in touch with each other and people need to go up to the roof to be rescued. Even when they have second floors. I never imagined that happening in Manila and even if it was already happening, I couldn't believe it. It was so surreal.
The ultimate conflict I was battling with was trying to figure out a way to help out. Each time an opportunity arises when I can donate to charity, volunteer for a cause and help the needy (in a legal way), my heart always skips a beat. I used to want to become a social worker. Its even natural that I fell in love with the most generous guy in the world, he makes me feel like a slacker in that area. Its just that, in my entire life I feel that I have been so blessed, continuously being blessed. How can I not share these blessings to others when everyday, an overflowing supply comes to me? So in a time like this, it felt like an instinct to go and reach out, and offer my time to volunteer. But alas, I was caught up in the whole corporate jungle. I had a deadline for my project at work and it needs most of my time to be able to complete it. So while my mom was cooking pansit to give to friends and families whose houses were badly hit by Ondoy, my dad and brothers were joining rescue operations, and my sister was doing volunteer work in the many relief operations area around the metro, I was either at home, stuck in front of the computer, trying to complete materials for a project, or in the office, working as usual. Two members of our team were also affected by the storm, and my boss was sick, so I had to be a team player and take on some work, stay in the office. More than anything though, my heart longed to be out there, helping and doing something relevant. Anyway, I managed to help out in my own little way as I was restless until I felt that I did my part.
And so... with the calamity that was Ondoy, and the scare that was typhoon Pepeng, I had some realizations. I know, by now, most of us have learned a thing or two because of this. I just wanted to share mine in this forum because as brides slash future (or present) homemakers, we need a firm grasp of what's important and valuable. Kinda basic, and we should all know them by now, but here they are anyway:
- When you're single, its easy to just go through life without a care in the world and take it one day at a time, but I realized that when you get married and (soon) become a mom, you will need to do so much more than exist. You need to know the proper values to teach your kids; you need to learn to lead by example. I am so much prouder and more appreciative of my mom now as I realize how much time I have left under her care. 'Charity begins at home is so true' and she is a clear manifestation of that. She always encourages us siblings to give more, be more generous with each other and those who aren't as fortunate. Same with my dad. He is not indifferent and he would extend our home, our possessions to people who need it. Growing up, we saw them devote their time, talents and treasure for worthy causes. I'm not trying to brag, but I think they did a pretty good job in instilling the value of giving to us. So while other friends and relatives were worried about their farms and pets in Farmville and Fish World (no offense to those who are into these, but really?! in times of calamity and other people are stranded and hungry?!), my siblings and I are in search of ways to be able to help, volunteer and assist those who are in need. Just like charity, apathy begins at home too. So before you dream of making and raising kids, think if you already have the right values to teach them. Do you want your kids to have the same character as you? If you're not yet sure, please do not "go forth and multiply" just yet.
- Note on giving: if you have an item in your closet that has been sitting there for more than a year, then it's not your property anymore. It's charity's. You are merely keeping it for the person who would have better use of it than closet-filler. With my hectic sched at work, getting clothes out of my closet was really the best I could do. Given how much of a packrat I am, I have clothes that I kept since my early college days, hoping I would slip back to my college girl body and wear those clothes again. But then, when my friend told me about this sermon she heard from the priest (one of the few times she was actually listening in mass), it was an eye opener. I realized, I have been keeping those clothes for so long thinking I "could" wear them again. But I know I won't. What, will I just keep them there til God knows when? While there are some girls out there who literally have nothing else to wear. So along with my sister, I took a good look at all our clothes and, with eyes half-closed, decided to give away those clothes that are still good, but we don't use anymore. Yes, you actually learn what giving is all about until it hurts. It's hard to part with old clothes, possessions you have had for years. You know when most girls are into shoes, some girls are into bags, I am most of a clothes-person. Memories about how happy I was when I got them, or how good I felt when I wore them keeps replaying in my mind. But am I gonna let that hold me back from putting a smile in another person's face? It was kinda sad to let go of that perfect pink top that I bought years ago, probably the nicest pink top I have ever had, but, in my head, I see a sigh of relief from girls who may just have found the perfect pick-me-upper that she badly needs. Anyway, the feeling was great...priceless if I may say. And I now have more room for new clothes, and a chance to update my wardrobe ;) and with the truckload of blessings that keep coming, I know a new perfect pink top will get to me soon :)
- But as much as we can give away and get rid of anything we want, we also need to learn to value the things we have and see if we really need to acquire new things. With the Ondoy calamity, I have been reminded of the value of money. I always say, "I need a new top, new shoes, stuff for my room, etc." But come to think of it, they aren't really needs. They are just wants I turned into needs. I look at my current office clothes, shoes and bags and I see that they're still okay. A bit worn-out, but still wearable and functional. No need to buy new stuff just yet. Because the amount that I spend on those little things that I claimed I needed can be spent helping out those who lost all their possessions. Also, we should learn to value every single thing that we have. Use them properly, maximize them. We can't bring them to our grave, we can't have them forever; sooner or later they will just disappear and we're lucky if they won't be washed out by a flood. Lets enjoy them while they last.
- I have never been so proud to be a Filipino. Smiles, unity and heroism in spite of the tragedy. Only in the Philippines.
- Family is the most important. I'm grateful that all of my relatives were safe during the storm. You can acquire new furniture, a new car, new house, but a family is irreplaceable.
- Most of all, keep the faith. PRAY. In the face of fear and panic, prayer calms us. It gives our minds clarity and peace, even for a short period of time. Its easy to believe all the doomsday talk with the series of tragedies happening, but it will not help, lest we become more anxious and afraid. Its funny how people go to church and hear mass and say they trust the Lord, but when difficulties arise, they forget all about the goodness of God. He is our creator, master of the universe, and He is our Father. Even logic concludes that a father who loves His children will not take away something from them, especially if He created it for them. Its just impossible in my book. We are loved, and the Lord is a faithful God. He is king over the flood. He's all over the place. Just be still; have faith.
These are just some of my learnings. It may be little teachings, but its a big deal if we try to live by it everyday. I hope, that I continue to acquire these lessons, even on ordinary and beautiful sunny days that lie ahead :)
Post on my wedding preps to follow soon, I wish ;)
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