Mamma Mia, let me count the ways...

I just saw Mamma Mia on HBO last night, and I was reminded again of how crazy I was about the movie. It's my one of my all-time favorites. I can watch it over and over and sing-along at the top of my lungs. But aside from the singing and dancing and the handsome actors and actresses and the fact that its shot in Greece, my dream destination, I guess its close to my heart because it was the first movie that I got pegs of what I want for our wedding. It's homey and personal, exactly how I wanted our wedding to be. No offense to other brides, but I'm not really the type who wants a princessy wedding, the kind where you will be drifted off to dreamland. I want the start of our life together to happen in a place where I'm home, in a place that's real to me. And I want to be surrounded by people that I love and I want them to be involved in this. I want to get ready in my parent's house, I want to ride in my father's car, I want to make our entourage personal gifts and give them handwritten notes, I'm sentimental like that. That's exactly how I saw Sophie's wedding in Mamma Mia.

So, enough talking, how about I show you some pictures of my favorite scenes and my pegs from this movie.

This movie was filled with colors that I love. Blushing pinks and ocean blues and of course, white. Pink and blue is part of our color motiff. I initially wanted a summer beach wedding, but we're not having one. I'm still happy though that we're kind of getting a soft vibe on it. Summer 2008, is the time that I got engaged, so its maybe why this movie really registered to my brain so quick.

I love the beach. I love water. We're getting married in thecity, but we have a pool in the reception. :) Don't you just love her kind of messed up hair, barely there makeup and flowy dress? I want a relaxed, laidback feel for my wedding look. Plus the flowers are gorgeous.

Mamma Mia, obviously, is a mother-daughter story. Father of the Bride, Meet the Parents, I wonder why movies want to focus on the father-daughter story. I'm close to my dad, but I think in my family, no one is more affected about my wedding than my mom. She cried when they found out I'm getting married, and growing up, I was really her "buntot." I'd go with her to the supermarket, her other errands, and just be with her as much as I can. Some girls aren't comfortable spending too much time with their mothers... I'm not that kind of girl. She'll tell me things she won't tell my other siblings, probably because I was the "mature one." Funny that Mama's also throwing a big party on the month of our wedding. She's turning 50 and she thought that would be a good excuse to throw a party. Just so she can invite other friends and relatives that I won't be able to invite for the wedding. No matter how independent and strong-headed I am, my mother can still save my ass at the end of the day. So I loved that this movie highlighted the mother-daughter bride angle. Even if they were always argue, in the end, Sophie still runs to her mom on her wedding day.

Friends and family aren't merely guests in our wedding. They will all have a special part. And when I dress up, I want my best girls to be there up until I reach the church. The bridesmaids' flowy dresses are beautiful. This is the scene where Sophie rides a donkey while her friends walk on the way to the church. Sophie was not a diva on her wedding day. Sure, she felt special, but she felt real. I want to be like that. I don't expect myself to be perfect on my wedding day. But I want to be perfectly happy... to be me. And although I'm not the most beautiful bride who ever walked the face of the earth, I want to feel special, and giddy, and excited. To be marrying the love of my life.

And of course, the passionate love affair. Sophie and Sky are so hot together. While I wish I can be as sexy as her, I can only settle for a groom that loves his bride the way Sky loves Sophie. And that I have from Day 1. Babe loves me a lot, he went out of his way to give me the wedding that I'm dreaming of. Weddings for me are not just commitments and formalizing unions, it should first of all, include hardcore, against-all-odds, passionate love. The kind where you are truly inseparable; the can't help falling in love type. Its that genuine look in each others eyes and knowing that life would truly be worth-living only if you can have this person in your arms. I've been with Babe for five years and although we have grown a lot and our relationship has hit its mature stages and people also think us getting married is the most sensible thing to do, everyday I know that I'm still as head-over-heels, crazy in love with him just like I was in Day 1. If I had to go through it all over again, I would still be perfectly happy. Because its him.

So yeah, I love that movie. And yay, bits of our concept and design layout will sort of resemble scenes from the movie and that was a pretty welcome coincidence. I know my real wedding will be as fun and unforgettable as this reel one. Even more. Well, that's coming soon :)

our gentlemen will be wearing...

SUITS from Onesimus.

Bragging? Not really. Just feeling good. After months of searching, tracking down possible options, going to different places to look for good deals and arranging the schedule and measurement of the guys, we just walked out of the Onesimus Factory Outlet earlier this afternoon carrying a bunch of swanky suit bags.

Okay, so two fittings with my entourage,two factory outlets and one heated encounter with a distasteful donya-donyahan customer later, I'm happy to share that our male entourage (most of them, at least) will be wearing their Onesimus suits to our wedding.

Its unbelievably priced lower than the famous Kamuning. The lowest quote I got there was 3500 for the coat and pants, I got it from Onesimus for almost P3,100 plus the quality, in my opinion, is a lot better.

Side-kwento, looking for suits for the male entourage and fixing their schedule was tougher than what I experienced with the girls. Women kasi look forward to going to designers and talking about dresses. Men are not into fittings, but when they take the time, they're very meticulous. Sobrang na-stress ako dun, but with the help of the wonderful Onesimus staff, I enjoyed the experience. It was a great way to bond with the guys as well. I'm so excited to see them in their Onesimus suits on our wedding day.

Being in the company of (mostly) men for the whole day though, kind of brought out the big eater in me... I ate rice twice today! That makes me so disappointed at myself, but being able to finally buy suits for the guys and making babe happy (I hope) is today's happy thought. Maybe even this week's happy thought. Scrap that though, I'm gonna have another beautiful day with a happy thought tomorrow (I might blog about it by then) until the rest of the week, and then on and on and on...:)

Can I tell you a secret?

I look at other brides photos and wedding videos to keep me motivated.

Yes, even those brides that I do not know. and I do that everyday, or almost everyday when I have the time.

I am a bit picky though. Imagine if I would look at all brides and all websites all the time. I have several favorites. Websites of several local wedding suppliers. I am partial to those who talk candidly and lovingly about their couples.

Some of my favorites are Veluz Reyes' blog, Jason Magbanua, Mangored, 30-FPS, Phoeben Teocson, K by Cunanan, Cecilio Abad...and of course, Jeff and Lisa. Not all of them are my suppliers of course, but I like looking at beautiful gowns and gorgeous and happy brides captured on film, or in photos.

Why? Maybe because apart from those magazine brides, those perfect photos in the glossies, those brides let me know that its real... that everything we're working hard for, what we want, what we imagine, what we dream of, it really happens! So if it happened to them, it could definitely happen to me.

So I need to work... for that slender body, for that glowing skin, for that picture-perfect grin, for the wedding that I have always dreamed of. And if it takes overcoming an unbelievable schedule, stressful decision-making and an almost impossible budget, I will so willingly brave it.

Just so at the end of the day, I can look at all our wedding pictures and videos, and marvel at what I did for love. And when all the memories fade and looking at pictures and videos is the last thing on my mind, I'll know that one thing remains: the man of my dreams holding my hand forever and ever.

Booked our flights! :)

YES!! :)

the resort and the whole trip's itinerary is still in the works, but their rates won't really change as fast as the airlines...

I'm so happy!! :)) will my true girl friends please get me tons of bathing suits on my shower party (if they're throwing me one)? :) and I will also need a rashguard :))

Another vanity post? Read it then tell me.

Okay so its February.
Just a few months to go before the big day comes.

Yes, its the day that I might have been dreaming of for a long, long time - guilty as charged. Of course, when I think of my wedding day, I imagined myself to be as svelte and as beautiful as I can ever be. The terms radiant, blooming, effortless, chic, gorgeous and even goddess-like might have come up.

Okay, I may have a bit too much high regard for myself. My parents brought me up telling me I'm beautiful, which has been reaffirmed by some third party like relatives and friends. So I might not have gotten over that.

Lately though, I have been feeling like I look like crap. Should I blame it on the hormones and the lack of exercise? I don't know. Its just that I'm supposed to be radiant already, but instead I look dull and tired. My main problem though, is my figure. I've put on so much weight that I could almost pass for a gay-bride. It's because I'm not the chubby type. I'm big-boned and bulky so I don't look cute like some plus-sized brides. I''m meant to be long and lean. So now I look masculine. Its so sad. I'm supposed to be at my prime, but at the look of it, it seemed like I've already let myself go.

I saw wedding pictures of a batchmate of ours on Facebook. She looked absolutely stunning and beautiful. I was so jealous. Well, she has always been one of the prettiest girls in the batch. Of course, we're way past that.

Its just that, when I look at other brides, they seem so radiant, so calm and collected. And I look at my reflection in the mirror - big face, double chin, facial hair and all, so I thought, am I gonna be the only awkward-looking bride in history? Will I be the first exception to the connotation that brides are the most beautiful on their wedding day?

NO. I should not let that happen. I'm fighting it. I claim that I will be beautiful on my wedding day. Come on, its not like a total makeover and transformation is required. I believe that I have the "goods", so there's really no need to pull off a miracle. I need to look better though; the best that I can be. If I have to work doubly, even ten times hard for it, I would. There's no surrender. I still have some more months to go. To lose two sizes, to have fairer skin; to load up on all that Vitamin C and E which will supposedly give me a radiant glow. And those skin products, I'll take all that I can; and to exercise as much as I can, at least three times a week. And I need to go back to boxing.

Why am I so into this? Well, aside from the fact that I have dreamed about this day for a long, long time so less than stunning is simply unacceptable, its because I'm marrying the man of my dreams. And for the longest time that we have been together, I have strived to be the girl in his. To be the best person, girlfriend, friend, partner that I can be - his dream girl. And our wedding day will sort of be the culmination, the affirmation that indeed, I am that girl. The girl he wished to be with for the rest of his life. The face that he will see when he opens his eyes in the morning. I want him to take one look at me and know, right at that moment, that he made the right choice.

Just yesterday, as we were discussing wedding preps over email, I realized that Babe was getting so anxious about the wedding budget. So I asked him why, and the next words he said just moved my heart from its very core: "Mahal na mahal kita Ming. I want you to be the star on our wedding day, at gagawin ko lahat para matupad yun." Those words alone, and the boxing match is over. I've already won first place, if life was a race.

When I walk in, I want people to think, even for a split-second, that Babe is the luckiest guy in the world for marrying me. And not that I'm this girl who just got lucky someone loved her enough to marry her at that state. Both are kind of true though. I'm lucky, he's lucky. We are both very blessed to have found our true love, at an early age, so they say.

I know thinking and talking about my appearance too much may sound so superficial, but really, I will only get married once. Is it so bad to want something that will give you great memories for the rest of your life?

When I'm old and wrinkly, I want to be able to look at my wedding photos and remember how I, beautiful and still in my prime, married the love of my life and lived happily together forever.

About the dress - somebody stop me! :P

(January 12, while Babe is asleep)

I haven't told you yet how much I love my wedding dress... :))

If there's one aspect of the wedding that I have daydreamed about most, next to the groom of course, it would be the dress. I know, its the girly-girl in me. Long before I have been engaged, I was already dreaming about my wedding dress. I have sketched it many times; pictured in my head that long white dress, with a beautiful train, flowing with me as I walk down the aisle. You know how some girls have that wedding dress dream, some girls don't. I do. In fact, its one thought that relaxes me and puts me to sleep at night. What? It's a girl thing.

So, when did I know that Tito Dan would be making my wedding dress? Maybe during Kuya JB at Ate Tina's wedding, when I saw the bride walk down the aisle in a Dan Cadiz creation. It was simple yet stunning. Probably the most simple from him that I saw. But the bride was so confident and felt pretty in her wedding gown. That moment, I knew that there was no looking elsewhere.

Tito Dan and I have been kinda chatty for several years now since Mama, Kaye and I would always go to him when we are in need of a dress for events; Kaye's debut, her prom, my graduation, a relative's wedding, and all those years, he hasn't let us down. We just come up with the cut, a design, something simple we saw from a magazine or on TV, and he gives us something... bonggacious - sorry, there is just no suitable alternative for the word. What he makes for us is always prettier than we imagine. Sometimes we are taken aback by his boldness to create such a design for us, but he is always confident that we can pull it off. He treats us like his muses which is why I'm always comfortable with him and his designs.

Now about the design that he made for me... for this one particular dress that will be the culmination of all the gowns I had in my life.

So I showed Tito Dan a picture I saw in a magazine. Its a dress by Romona Keveza, an international fashion designer. Its really just simple but elegant and romantic. Girly but not princess-y. Or maybe it is somehow a princess dress, but not a Cinderella ballgown. So I explained to him what I'm visualizing (as a client, I'm very expressive on what I want, and keen on details): the cut, the color, the texture and weight of the fabric; the restrictions - not too low on the front (I don't want to get in an argument with Babe about it on our wedding day), minimal beadwork. Instantly after that, he sketched a dress for me. And it was beautiful. It's flirty, flowy, offbeat and romantic. It wasn't exactly how I pictured my wedding dress to be, but unexplainably, I was blown away.

It wasn't the dress I saw in my head a thousand times, but one look at it and I knew it was me. Maybe its not me in my constant state yet, but its the woman that I want to be. Its the dress I want to wear when I'm meeting the love of my life down the aisle. It was gorgeous and breathtaking. I loved it instantly and I'm so excited to see it come to life and wear it.

I know I just saw the initial sketch, but I already have a good, unshakable feeling about it. I know Dan Cadiz wouldn't disappoint. After all, he waited a long time for this, he said so himself. Which is why I'm very confident that it's gonna turn out beautifully.

Now that the arrangements for the dress have been made, I only have to work on the body, which should do justice to the dress. I need a leaner frame by mid-February or the end of February when I would be having my measurements taken. Like Tito Dan said, I'll get married only once, when all eyes would be on me. So I should do whatever is needed to look and feel beautiful on that day. Diet and exercise it is. I can do it, I know I can. All for the dream dress and my babe's face when he sees me walking towards him. See? the groom is always number one on my daydream list ;)

(Sorry, I can't post pictures of the peg and the sketch. I want it to be a surprise for most.)

City Hall visit - January 4

(wrote this in Hillsborough Court, while Babe is playing basketball with our friends)

We went to the City Hall this morning to inquire about getting a Marriage License at the Civil Registry. As I expected, we weren't able to apply because it's still not within the four-month validity. We have to prepare the documents though in time for Babe's arrival in May, then we can apply.

There wasn't much action there and we were even out of the City Hall in 15 minutes, but well, doing or taking care of the legal requirements kinda says "This is It" for me. This wedding is really happening. It's like Babe's saying "Sure na!" in a game show and whether he wins or loses, he'll stand by his answer. He's ready to spend the rest of his life with me, and we're getting some papers to prove it. Yay! :)) It makes me feel giddy and super excited for another great life. More happy days ahead!